These dispatches are part of a special BQE section, “Sirena’s Pages”: an installment of our slacker film script accompanied by an unrelated but interesting piece of antiwork- adjacent content.

If you’re not into these screenplay updates but want to keep getting the rest of Big Quit Energy, you can use the unsubscribe link to adjust your settings to opt out of “Sirena’s Pages” specifically while staying on the list for all other Big Quit Energy emails.

Previous scene

The Scene

INT. Zoe’s Dining Room. Night.

A dining room in a tastefully yet minimally decorated single-family home.

The family sits around the table. Zoe proudly serves a mole dish to Jaime and Matilde. Matilde wears a soccer jersey.

ZOE It is an honor to initiate you into mole night.

She scoops some on Sirena’s plate.

ZOE With ingredients from my garden.

Sirena has a bite while Grizzie serves herself.

SIRENA I think I get it now.

GRIZZIE Get what?

SIRENA Why people work so hard here. (beat) It’s to distract themselves from how bad the food is.

Grizzie snorts and coughs.

MATILDE (Spanish) Sirena! Behave!

Zoe freezes, her smile tightening into a grimace. She starts laughing, as if in on the joke, painfully forced.

Everyone looks at each other, uncomfortable.

ZOE Could you do better?

SIRENA (stands dramatically) Easy!

INT. Zoe’s Kitchen. Night.

Next to a glistening, stainless steel stove, Sirena’s faded and filthy plastic crockpot bubbles with rice and beans. Sirena hustles over it like a TV chef.

Grizzie watches her, eating chips straight from a bag.

SIRENA This is how my grandmother does it. Simple. When you love rice and beans, you don’t have to cater to the man!

Matilde sticks her head in the kitchen.

MATILDE That’s her philosophical way of saying she can’t cook anything else.

GRIZZIE It smells...aggressive.

SIRENA That’s flavor, which apparently you’ve never experienced.

She dramatically sprinkles more seasoning, then clangs against the pot, letting steam rise like she’s conjuring magic.

INT. Zoe’s Dining Room. Night.

Sirena slams the pot in the middle of the table, triumphant. Zoe serves herself cautiously, while tastes a small scoop.

MATILDE Exactly like your grandma’s. (beat) Which is to say...not great.

Zoe takes a bite and freezes. Sirena watches, ready for an insult.

ZOE This...is not bad!

Grizzie nods, her mouth full. Matilde looks stunned.

Even Sirena is a little puzzled.

MATILDE (Spanish, muttering) Maybe they really don’t have any taste in this country.

INT. Zoe’s Dining Room. Night.

The family placidly eats some churros for dessert. Zoe steeps a kettle of tea for herself.

ZOE So Sirena, you don’t want to hear my plan to put your talent to work?

SIRENA My what?

Zoe pours her tea into a mug.

ZOE Your way with words. Your wit. Your modern, effortless cool under pressure.

Sirena and Matilde both raise eyebrows as Zoe slides a pamphlet across the table to Sirena.

Sirena looks at the pamphlet--it has a cartoon rocket ship blasting into the sky. She reads the heading.

SIRENA “Migrant Achievers: Lifting Migrants to New Heights.” What is this? Are they launching me to Mars?

Sirena puts the pamphlet aside, tipping back in her chair self-satisfied. It wobbles and she has to save herself from falling.

Matilde looks at the pamphlet, intrigued.

MATILDE (English) Is there an age limit?

Zoe hesitates.

ZOE (Spanish) Legally, no...but...

She scans Matilde’s soccer jersey.

ZOE They aren’t really fans of that team.

Matilde looks down at her soccer jersey and awkwardly covers it with her hand.

Zoe slowly takes the pamphlet back from her.

ZOE (to Sirena, conciliatory, coaxing) You know, when I was your age, my mentor told me living your best life is just having the courage to say ‘yes.’ I’ve built my best life on that alone.

Sirena casually picks food from her teeth.

ZOE And under the right mentoring and leadership, you can blossom into an amazing asset for our community.

SIRENA Our community?

ZOE Latinos. We have to stick together in this country.

SIRENA And who’s the right mentor and leader for me? You, I’m guessing?

ZOE Well, yea. (upbeat, nervous) All you gotta do is say “yes.”

SIRENA Nah. I’m perfectly happy with my level of blossoming.

She wipes her fingers on a napkin.

SIRENA And, no offense, I know you all technically count as “Latinas,” but you really have no idea about it.

Zoe tenses, but her smile is unshaken.

ZOE Sirena, if you want to stay in this country, you’ll need to contribute.

SIRENA Send me back. Even better. (Points at Matilde) She’s living her dream here. That’s what matters.

Matilde pulls her chair out and stands.

MATILDE (Spanish) Sirena, a minute.

Ext. ZOE’S HOUSE BACK YARD. Dusk.

Matilde drags Sirena to a safe distance away from the door.

MATILDE (Spanish, low) Will you stop being impossible?

SIRENA Why are we whispering?

Matilde glares. Both are startled by an automatic sprinkler system and ambient lights that come by themselves.

Matilde can’t help but admire it all for a second.

MATILDE How about some gratitude for being here? We could be in the street selling candy.

Sirena groans.

MATILDE This woman is obsessed with you. I don’t get it, but she is.

SIRENA Good taste.

MATILDE Whatever. Use it.

SIRENA Use it? You make it sound like she’s a coupon.

Matilde pulls her closer.

MATILDE (Softly) Please, just for a while, put in a little effort. Once I get in with her, you can go home and rot if you want. I’ll buy your ticket myself.

Sirena looks away, watching through the patio door as Jaime happily plays with a living room light dimmer, at awe with it.

SIRENA Great, so I’m just here to be your wingman.

MATILDE I thought you want to go home.

SIRENA I do! But...

She kicks a pebble hard across the grass and groans.

MATILDE For your brother’s sake.

SIRENA (snorts) I don’t think he’ll like it here. Maybe I’ll do him a favor and get us all deported.

MATILDE (stern) Time in jail is a favor? You’d do that to him?

SIRENA I’m joking, Jesus Christ.

She turns back toward the house. Matilde follows.

MATILDE You think everything’s a joke.

SIRENA Only the funny stuff.

INT. Zoe’s Kitchen. Night.

Sirena barges in while Zoe loads the dishwasher.

SIRENA (English) Fine, I’ll pull my weight. But not with your corporate nonsense. Find me a job with real humans.

Zoe is amused at the insult. She calls out.

ZOE Grizzie! How’s your job?

GRIZZIE (offscreen) Eh, kinda sucks, but I learn a lot.

ZOE That’s right. And now you have someone to mentor at it.

Grizzie pops her head into the kitchen, seeing Sirena.

SIRENA Isn’t she like three years younger than me?

ZOE Mature beyond her years. Makes me very proud. And she’s eager to help you grow as well, isn’t that right?

GRIZZIE (apprehensive) Yea. Sounds great.

Matilde joins Zoe in loading dishes. Zoe gives her a reassuring look.

Sirena smiles at Grizzie, wearily. Grizzie looks a little embarrassed.

Scene Notes

In many ways, this is where we start cooking, emotionally speaking.

• The plot importance of this sequence is that it’s the first time Sirena directly insults Zoe, attacking her very sense of identity–the “inciting incident’” for her adversarial arc with Sirena. Until now, Zoe has never had anyone outright reject the types of opportunities she offers and that she herself took earlier in life. It must be throwing her for a loop, though she’s hiding that fact for now.

• It’s also the first time that we see Matilde and Sirena in a sincere confrontation that’s deeper than just passive-aggressive bickering, where gives importance to her mom’s opinion, even if she quickly tries to play it off.

• Finally, we’ve cast Grizzie and Sirena in an unwilling “mentor” relationship, almost like the start of an odd couple comedy, setting up possibilities for conflict between them.

That said, this scene also feels a bit labored to me.

• The cooking bit is something I find charming, but in every draft I write it’s felt like I forced it in there. Perhaps this will be a darling I have to kill in the end, but I want it in there for now.

• Like the pervious steps, I’m consolidating a lot of plot steps that had been scattered across scenes before. And again, I’m wondering if it’s too crammed.

Speaking of labored, I’m been having a hard time writing Zoe.

• She has to sound “corporate cringe,” but in the first draft she was way too caricatured. I’m trying to keep her a little ridiculous while humanizing her wherever I can.

• For example, in her and her daughter being (unfairly, I think, and also something that I’ve experienced directly) attacked as not Latina enough by Sirena. And more generally, showing how she clings to her own self-narrative, and possibly doubts it herself.

• One huge question is if it’s believable that she sees all this potential in Sirena, despite the latter giving her no willing indication of motivation or, really, skill. I think it’s her bias for youth (a condition that our society suffers from), but I don’t know if this reads true.

Finally, If you don’t remember Sirena’s crockpot, it’s not your fault. I forgot to include it in scene 1. The magic of the internet is that I can go back and change scenes after the fact. Which I did! The crockpot is now in scene 1. It will make other appearances.

Antiwork content of the week: Your inner boss talks through your money beliefs

Friend of the blog tries to tease out assumptions about money in this insightful, heartfelt essay. If you look at the money beliefs that end up bare, you can see an inner boss which isn’t dissimilar from the one that I’ll dare say most of us carry.

Are your stories about money keeping tied to workaholic behavior, despite your best efforts?

These dispatches are part of a special BQE section, “Sirena’s Pages”: an installment of our slacker film script accompanied by an unrelated but interesting piece of antiwork- adjacent content.

If you’re not into these screenplay updates but want to keep getting the rest of Big Quit Energy, you can use the unsubscribe link to adjust your settings to opt out of “Sirena’s Pages” specifically while staying on the list for all other Big Quit Energy emails.

Previous scene

The Scene

EXT. Downtown Chicago. Day.

The streets hum with energy. Honking horns, snippets of conversations, the low rumble of an L train in the distance.

Zoe walks ahead, her steps purposeful, as if she’s guiding a museum tour--all while occasionally glancing at her phone.

Matilde scurries after her, wide-eyed and giddy, wearing her “Nutrivance” cap while Jaime holds her hand and skips.

Sirena trudges behind, hands in her hoodie, scanning her surroundings with cautious curiosity. She grimaces at a pair of COMMUTERS power-walking and while they slurp down tall cups of coffee.

She glares at them as they walk by. Grizzie, who reads a book while shuffling alongside her, notices.

GRIZZIE Not a fan of coffee?

SIRENA Not when you drink it like that. What the hell is that?

GRIZZIE Sometimes you just need the caffeine boost. I’ve been there.

Sirena shakes her head.

Matilde suddenly skids to a stop at the base of a towering building. She slaps both palms against the glassy wall and leans back dramatically, staring straight up.

MATILDE (English) It goes so high! Look!

She waves frantically at her kids. Jaime, thrilled, joins her, pressing his nose on the glass.

Sirena slows, tilts her head, and mutters.

SIRENA (Spanish) Yes, very tall.

Matilde looks over at Grizzie and Zoe.

ZOE (Smiles, Spanish) It’s easy to forget how tall they are, living here.

Her phone beeps, and she looks down at it with an urgent expression,

MATILDE I’m never gonna forget.

She pulls back and glances down at her shirt, now streaked faintly with soot. She rubs at it, embarrassed.

A Migrant Vendor steps into frame, carrying a battered cardboard box. Her BABY is strapped to her back. She stops abruptly, directly in front of Matilde, stretching the box toward her.

MIGRANT VENDOR (Spanish) Chocolate, candy, caramels.

There’s a beat of silence. The group shuffles slightly, unsure of what to do.

Studying Matilde, the vendor shuffles in her box and pulls out some small packaged obleas.

MIGRANT VENDOR Obleas?

Sirena and Jaime’s eyes both light up.

JAIME Obleas!

Matilde, flustered, rummages through her pockets.

Zoe takes her eyes off her phone, brow furrowed.

Matilde pulls out a crumpled bill but, upon handing it to the mother, realizes it’s an old receipt. She rummages again as the vendor looks expectantly.

Sirena rolls her eyes and pulls out loose change from her pocket, giving it to the vendor.

Matilde grabs three small obleas and, after more rummaging, gives her some more coins as a tip. She smiles.

MATILDE Thank you.

JAIME Those aren’t dollars.

Matilde looks alarmed at a couple coins that are foreign currency.

MATILDE Oops.

She takes them back and chuckles nervously. The mother nods and goes on her way.

Zoe stands with her arms crossed, like a stern parent.

Matilde, apprehensive, offers her an oblea, but Zoe doesn’t even look at it.

ZOE (Spanish) You should be saving your money, not encouraging the scrounging that everyone already assumes our people do.

SIRENA Come on, she’s hustling hard out here.

ZOE (English) I thought that was for suckers.

SIRENA (stammers, thinking) Well, she’s not hustling any harder than she needs to be.

ZOE And that’s something admirable, in your book?

Matilde looks down at her oblea with shame.

Jaime pouts up at the skyline, spotting something.

JAIME Look, like your hat.

Matilde looks at a nondescript glass tower with “Nutrivance” in blocky, fluorescent letters. She slaps Sirena’s arm.

MATILDE (Spanish) No way! They’re here?

ZOE (bemused, proud) Funny enough, I work there.

Matilde gasps, dropping the oblea. Jaime immediately seizes on it.

MATILDE (Softly) You work at Nutrivance? We see them all over Ciudad Montes.

She grabs at her hat, in awe.

Zoe nods, walking over to Sirena.

ZOE Didn’t expect that, huh?

SIRENA (flat) Actually, it makes total sense.

MATILDE (excited) What do you do there?

ZOE Actually, I brought you all here on purpose, because I have a surprise--

SCREECH! She jumps as a livery car pulls up aggressively on them. Through the crack of a window, the rowdy, gruff voice of Roland booms.

ROLAND Extending your vacation, I see.

Zoe composes herself.

ZOE Hello, Roland. I’m doing field work. Everyone, this is Roland, CEO of Nutrivance.

Matilde enthusiastically goes up to the car and tries to look through the crack.

MATILDE It’s an honor.

ROLAND This is the hotshot you’re recruiting? Already got her a hat?

MATILDE (excited) You’re a recruiter?!

Zoe turns to the group.

ZOE I was gonna make it more of a surprise moment, but...

She pulls out a glossy pass from her bag.

MATILDE A work permit!

ZOE This one’s for you.

Zoe beams, handing it to Matilde. Matilde’s hopeful expression falters.

MATILDE Housecleaning. That’s...great.

SIRENA No gigs for engineers?

ZOE Degrees, certifications. They’re needed here.

Awkward silence.

ZOE But you already have your first customer!

She points at Roland’s window.

ROLAND Yea, my last one went remote. Like, back-home remote.

ZOE So, you’re up. Timing is everything!

Matilde nods and smiles.

MATILDE It’s wonderful. Thank you.

Zoe reaches in her bag again, more giddy.

ZOE As for you, Sirena.

SIRENA Don’t bother giving me one.

ZOE Oh, but it’s something very special. I pulled some strings for a special talent like you, and I think you’ll like...

Sirena is already walking away.

SIRENA I wasn’t joking. I’m not interested in working.

The group, not sure what to do, continues walking behind her. Matilde waves bye at Roland, smiling, and glances at the Nutrivance building one last time before she leaves, her steps once again energized.

Roland’s window comes down a crack, so we can faintly see him, as Zoe lingers.

ROLAND Not interested in working? That’s the kind of initiative you’re recruiting for?

ZOE She’ll be ready.

Scene Notes

I allowed some personal indulgences in this scene:

• The leaning up against the building and looking up is what I did all summer my first time in a big American city.

• The beef with how people drink coffee is also something I remember my mom complaining about when we first moved here.

Part of what I love about screenwriting is that, when you’re in a groove, all characters represent different parts of you.

This is the first scene that I extensively changed and rewrote, and now there’s a lot of plot business taken care of here:

• Most important, Matilde’s general desire to succeed in the US now has a concrete objective that can drive her actions in the story–getting in to Nutrivance via Zoe and Roland’s good graces.

• Also, though we don’t quite know exactly Zoe has planned, we know she has something planned for Sirena and that Sirena will most likely resist it, setting up the central conflict for the story.

• Finally, we introduce Roland, who will carry weight later in the story. In the previous draft, he didn’t show up until almost the end of act I, and it felt like we were just cramming him in there randomly because it was convenient. Seeding him earlier, I feel, adds more credence to his importance later in the story.

• But is the scene now a little too crammed with plot business? Kinda feels like I’m checking a lot of boxes here and forcing things to happen not quite organically. I tried to add some pacing to alleviate this feeling, but I’m not sure if it’s quite hitting.

• Either way, I’d rather have this problem for now, than the previous problem of dragging out all these plot points and character introductions over 3-4 scenes.

Finally, I’m not sure if it’s gimmicky to keep Roland behind a window for now, but it feels in line with his futurely oblivious microagressions. Also, I enjoy the little line about what happened to his previous housekeeper.

The best conversation about writing I’ve heard this year

This isn’t our usual anti-work content, but for any fiction writers out there, I couldn’t resist plugging a great conversation that my friend had with Lousville author .

There are great nuggets there on her process, on how to approach research for your stories, and about the process of getting an agent. Let alone that her novel sounds bad ass. In a platform full of writing geeks, this was the best conversation about writing I encountered in 2025.

These dispatches are part of a special BQE section, “Sirena’s Pages”: an installment of our slacker film script accompanied by an unrelated but interesting piece of antiwork- adjacent content.

If you’re not into these screenplay updates but want to keep getting the rest of Big Quit Energy, you can use the unsubscribe link to adjust your settings to opt out of “Sirena’s Pages” specifically while staying on the list for all other Big Quit Energy emails.

Previous scene

Next Scene

The Scene

INT. Immigrant processing center. Day.

Shivering and wrapped in a towel, Jaime sits on a bench inside a crowded center that looks like a DMV.

With envy, he watches a girl happily clutch a teddy bear.

Sirena and Matilde, also in towels, sit beside him. Sirena shivers.

MATILDE (Spanish) Don’t ask for sympathy. You’re the one who got us put in this freezer.

She quickly straightens up and smiles politely as...

Zoe glides through with a stopwatch, stopping in front a MIGRANT who she engages in a silent eye-contact test. He looks away. She clicks her stopwatch and writes a note, unimpressed.

She drops a snack in his hand.

ZOE (Spanish) Welcome, good luck.

She moves on. Sirena watches her, bewildered.

A number bell DINGS. Matilde hurries to a counter with two GUARDS half-working, half-playing chess.

MATILDE (English) Hello.

Guard 1 puts his hand up, telling her to wait.

GUARD 1 (to phone) Does your embassy claim this man? … You do? Great. Few weeks to a few months.

He points a SOUTH ASIAN MIGRANT toward a packed holding room.

GUARD 1 (slow, pointing) Over there.

He turns to Matilde...

GUARD 1 (Spanish) Hands please.

...and starts taking her fingerprints, taking a quick break between fingers to make a move on the chess board.

GUARD 2 taps lazily at a computer while studying the board, raising his eyebrows.

Then, as if remembering he has a job, he turns to Matilde.

GUARD 2 (Spanish) Your hearing will take a few weeks.

He turns to the board, makes a move, and continues.

GUARD 2 Make yourself at home.

Matilde surveys the crowded center. A bunch of people, dead-eyed watch a corner TV that plays Marley and Me. A sneeze echoes under the film’s cheerful score.

Across the room, Zoe slips a sudoku sheet onto a bench, in front of another group of migrants. She steps back. No one bites. She sighs, notes it.

At a jug, Sirena pours Gatorade. Grizzie does math homework beside it.

SIRENA (English) What is she doing?

GRIZZIE No clue. She says it’s our way of “volunteering” on vacation.

SIRENA This is your vacation?

Back at the counter...

MATILDE (English) While I wait...can I work? I know engineering.

Guard 1 looks at her skeptically.

GUARD 1 (Spanish) Do you have a degree?

Matilde’s eyes drop.

MATILDE I learned by doing.

GUARD 1 (dry) Another engineer, fresh off the river.

Sirena catches this and perks up, frowning.

GUARD 2 (Struggling) You’re from...Seeuuu

Matilde opens her mouth to answer but Sirena steps in.

SIRENA Ciudad Montes.

Guard 2 nods.

Matilde gives her a look like “what are you doing?”

SIRENA (English) Never heard of it? It’s a paradise only an idiot would leave to come here.

Matilde’s look is now a glare.

Zoe also perks up.

GUARD 2 (English, to Guard 1) Doesn’t wanna be here. That’s a new one.

GUARD 1 (English) Wish more thought that way, instead of hustling for our work.

SIRENA Work? I won’t be doing that.

She casually grabs a piece from Guard 1…

SIRENA Don’t let him take your lunch, rookie.

…and makes a move for him.

SIRENA Hustling is for suckers.

Guard 2 looks at her, stunned.

GUARD 2 (English) Your English ain’t bad.

Zoe drifts closer, locked on Sirena.

MATILDE (English, proud) We taught ourselves. Discovery channel.

A few quick moves—click-clack. Sirena keeps reaching in, not letting Guard 1 get his moves in.

GUARD 1 (annoyed, to Sirena) Most people are grateful we don’t ship them straight back. Would you prefer that? Can’t cut it here?

Sirena looks at him, betraying offense, but brushes it off.

SIRENA I’d totally cut it here.

Matilde snorts.

SIRENA I just don’t feel like it.

Matilde is now worried and tries to pull Sirena away.

MATILDE (To guards, nervous) Maybe we should have separate applications.

(Nervous laughter)

Kidding.

Sirena gives a fake, boisterous laugh.

SIRENA Great, then mine won’t say “vibes engineer with no degree.”

Matilde shoots her an offended look.

GUARD 1 (dead serious) Happy to serve. Head to the waiting cell. We’ll arrange a bus home. Only takes a few months.

Sirena glances at the holding area: shivering families, a single exposed toilet.

GUARD 1 What, were you thinking a first class flight?

He starts typing. Zoe swoops, gently closing the laptop.

ZOE That won’t be necessary. I’ll sponsor them.

Everyone stares—even Grizzie looks up from her homework.

Zoe hands a letter. Guard 2 skims, shrugs, stamps.

GUARD 2 Whatever. Good luck.

Sirena flicks one last move on the board, cocky.

SIRENA Sorry we couldn’t finish.

GUARD 2 We could.

(moves a piece, beat)

Checkmate.

Guard 1 facepalms. Sirena’s swagger drains as Matilde steers her off.

EXT. Processing Center Parking Lot. Day.

The family loads into Zoe’s immaculate SUV: Matilde corrals bags and barks orders at Sirena. Grizzie fusses with floor mats. Jaime bounces up and down from the back door.

Sirena peeks into the SUV.

SIRENA This is huge! You could live in here!

She folds one of the seats down and lays down, as if shopping for a mattress. Grizzie chuckles.

GRIZZIE Live here? It’s a car.

Sirena sits up.

SIRENA It’s a van.

GRIZZIE Technically... SUV

SIRENA Whatever. Don’t Americans live in these all the time and travel the world?

MATILDE Don’t mind her. She’s new to the country.

She shoos an offended Sirena away and folds the chair back up.

At a distance, out of earshot, Zoe dials her phone.

ZOE (into phone, low) Roland? I’ve got the perfect candidate. A natural.

Scene Notes

• The center itself reflects descriptions from a Youtuber who spent some time in a Texas processing and detention center during the Biden administration. Of course, America’s already-previously-grim immigration situation has become even more of a horror show since. I considered working in some of those changes, but decided not to. When it’s all said and done, I’d like this story to make an argument for what I see as the unapologetic dignity (not justified by “hard work”) that immigrants deserve even when the system treats them relatively “well,” and the court of public opinion doesn’t feel the need to grant them sympathy because they’re facing down the gestapo.

• You may notice quite a few tags denoting language, as characters switch between Spanish and English. I don’t think it comes across much when you read it, but I’m trying to have language use convey power dynamics and assumptions that characters make about each other. Namely, notice that Matilde speaks to every American in English, but they insist on speaking Spanish to her. While Zoe, for example, readily speaks to Sirena in English, a way in which she holds her in higher regard.

• This scene has passages of verbal sparring, which I always enjoy, but in the back of my mind I’m always wondering if I’m slowing the scene down just to fit some zingers.

• The above is where re-reading, and doing it out loud, sometimes helps. You don’t listen for the content necessarily, but for whether the pacing sounds pleasing.

• Like the previous scene, the plot of this one didn’t change very dramatically from draft 1. The only large difference is Zoe’s strange evaluation of migrants at the center. Since on this draft she has a stronger reason to be down there (not just a wacky “vacation,” as she has her daughter believe), it feels appropriate to seed that a bit and in the process take the opportunity for some offbeat humor.

• 1/14/2026 edit: Because I realized later that Sirena’s pursuit of a van feels a bit out of nowhere, I’ve seeded in this scene through a bit of dialogue.

Berlin: the slacker capital?

I’ve never been to Berlin, so I don’t know how accurate this is. But there are interesting observations in here about it as an outlier capital where people are laid back and disheveled. If Sirena had to leave Ciudad Montes, maybe she would’ve liked Berlin instead of America.

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These dispatches are part of a special BQE section, “Sirena’s Pages.” If you’re not into these screenplay updates but want to keep getting the rest of Big Quit Energy, you can use the unsubscribe link to adjust your settings to opt out of “Sirena’s Pages” specifically while staying on the list for all other Big Quit Energy emails.

Next scene

Friends, we’re finally on our way!

Took long enough, but I’m ready to start publicly publishing scenes from the re-written draft of Sirena: A Drag on America, for the first time since embarking on this project two years ago. Honestly, it’s a little bit of a milestone moment, and I’m a little proud.

I’ve slowly been able to rewrite three scenes already, so hopefully “staying ahead” of a weekly publishing cadence on here will be a good incentive to keep at it.

As I said before, with each installment of these you’ll get:

• Today’s scene

• Miscellaneous notes on the thought process behind it

• An unrelated piece of antiwork content from someone else that I think is worth sharing. Feel free to jump straight down to that.

The Scene

EXT. The Rio Grande, Mexican side. DAY.

A free-range cow munches lazily on a scrubby bush. SIRENA—20, hoodie up, carrying a faded crockpot—scowls at it from a walking path.

SIRENA (Spanish): I should’ve been a cow.

JAIME, 12, sprawled in the dirt with a knock-off Game Boy, doesn’t look up.

JAIME (Spanish): Why would you wish that?

SIRENA: You just get to stand there and chew. No one bothers you.

Jaime grunts, goes back to his game.

MATILDE, 42, faded jeans and an old NASA T, approaches, wiping sweat from her brow.

MATILDE (Spanish): It’s ready.

She notices a teddy bear—sloppily painted white—dangling from a tree branch.

MATILDE: That’s cute. Jaime, you want it?

Jaime glances up, unimpressed.

JAIME: No thanks, I’m a bit old for that.

Matilde shrugs and heads for the water, waving at her kids to follow.

She leads them to a makeshift raft: kiddie pool floats, milk jugs, a camping tarp.

She gives one float a final pump of air.

SIRENA: This is the plan?

MATILDE: It’ll float. All you need.

She helps Jaime climb in. The raft shakes, but holds.

She climbs in after him, patting it like a trusty old car.

MATILDE: See? Solid.

Sirena eyes the American bank, reluctant.

SIRENA: I could just stay here.

MATILDE: Not that again. Get in.

Sirena sighs, wades in, and perches uneasily.

EXT. The Rio Grande, American side. DAY.

ZOE, 41, outdoors gear overkill, arranges water bottles with calm precision.

GRIZZIE, 18, in oversized sunhat and pristine sneakers, hovers nearby.

ZOE (English): You only set out water? Diversify.

Grizzie blinks, then hurriedly produces granola bars from a bag and lays them out.

Zoe nods, satisfied, scanning the river.

EXT. The Rio Grande, on the water. DAY.

Matilde pushes the raft forward with a stick.

MATILDE (bright): Easy, easy. See? We’re moving.

Sirena opens her crockpot to reveal a bunch of clothes and knick-knacks. She pulls out a bag of obleas--small, caramelized wafers.

Matilde glances at them, bemused.

MATILDE: A little taste from home?

SIRENA: Goodbye gift from Tita.

She chews on one.

SIRENA: You think they have these in America?

MATILDE: I doubt they waste their time with obleas. We’ll be enjoying bigger snacks in no time.

Sirena looks back at the Mexican shore shrinking behind them. She shuts the crockpot.

SIRENA: I like my snacks humble.

She leans forward to get off, but Matilde yanks her hoodie.

SIRENA: Let go!

In the commotion, Jaime’s Game Boy slips from his shirt pocket and into the water.

He lunges for it, and the raft flips--all three go tumbling into the river.

EXT. Rio Grande, American Side. DAY.

Zoe squints, hearing splashing.

She spots the chaos: arms, legs, floats, a hand propping up a crockpot.

ZOE: Grizzie. There.

She sprints off, while Grizzie strolls after her, concerned and confused.

Zoe dives into the river with a flourish, and swims expertly toward the flailing family.

Scene Notes

• The opening’s still lifted straight from Boudu Saved From Drowning (thanks again for that rec!). I’m usually wary of homages, but starting in the Rio Grande just feels too symbolically right to resist. The real challenge will be pulling it off on a small budget… but that’s tomorrow’s problem!

• What does still make me nervous is the tone of this as an unserious slacker take on something as serious as undocumented migration. I’ve never crossed the border myself, and no amount of research — memoirs, YouTube videos, you name it — will change that. So while the story begins with a crossing, it’s really about immigration at large, which is closer to my own experience.

• But if I can park my anxiety about depicting the crossing too lightly, I like that this tone our film as the total opposite of the tragic, workhumping, “poverty porn” immigration stories we usually see. I don’t know of a story that tackles immigration this way before. (if you know of any, please flag them in the comments!)

• While the plot events of this scene has remained unchanged from the first rewrite, I’ve made some adjustments:

  • Grizzie’s less of a snark and more compliant now, which fits her new arc.

  • Added a prelude with the cow and teddy bear — inspired by real Rio Grande crossing footage. It adds some bloat but also a nice slacker texture.

  • Also, as with every scene rewrite, I have polished down dialogue to be less on the nose and substituted actions for dialogue wherever I could. I’m not gonna note it in every scene, so just take that as a given step. Example: Sirena asking about obleas instead of outright saying “I can’t do this.”

All in all, this is a scene I’ve consistently felt good about since the first draft. It’s not always easy to start a story with an engaging episode, but I think this scene does that. (Watch me end up killing it later, as is often the case with my dearest “darlings”)

Consumerism as the Perfection of Slavery [EDIT]

(EDIT 3/25/26: The creator who made the video that I previously referenced here has since gone a bit viral for his Iran War analysis and, as part of his newfound fame, has unfortunately exposed himself as a holocaust denier so I no longer want to platform him. That said, while not linking to his videos anymore, the sentiment below holds and I still agree with it, so I’m keeping that part.)

This particular one gives simple and clear words to something that I’ve always felt instinctually: consumerism is a competition for prestige that drives people into debt and makes them wage slaves that hate each other.

It also made me reflect on how much I (and those around me, as far as I can tell) make our decisions (including romantic ones) primarily through economic logic.

Maybe Sirena felt this icky aura as she crossed the river, and that’s why she panicked and tried to turn back.

As always, any feedback, criticism, reaction, whatever is encouraged and appreciated and may work its way into future versions of the film. See you at the next scene!

To make up for it, I made a quick video montage sharing my improvised analog process for thinking through and reshuffling the Sirena story outline. Maybe it’ll help in your projects!

(If you prefer the YouTube viewing experience, watch the video here)

Why so much online writing rubs you the wrong way

Also–while wrestling with this messy outline, I was reminded why so much online writing leaves me cold. I’ve been revisiting a fun piece by where he splits writing into two types: instrumental (writing to effect an external outcome) and metamorphic (writing for internal transformation).

When he said that 99% of the writing online is instrumental, it clicked. This is why internet rabbit holes are demoralizing must of the time–they’re extremely careerist and transactional! But the good stuff is usually metamorphic, messy, and slow.

Worth reading if you want help curating what’s worth your attention.

See you soon with actual scenes!

This is the third update on the progress of our film to broaden the slacker genre.

Last dispatch: #2

I haven’t been exactly prolific on BQE over the last year, but behind the scenes your neighborhood antiwork blog has been busy crafting our film. As of a few weeks ago, we finally have a completed first draft of the Sirena: A Drag on America (Working Title) screenplay!

What now? When do you get to see the story? Well, while I’m happy with it as a first draft, I’ve already gotten some great constructive feedback on it and have a fairly clear idea of how to vastly improve it. I want you to experience the improved version, but I also don’t want to wait too long to finally share something with you all.

So here’s the plan:

• I’ll do the second rewrite publicly, publishing scenes here as I finish them. Hopefully this rewards your patience if you’ve put up with these updates and all the slacker film analyses over the last two years. Selfishly, it may also get me some real-time feedback so that I can sharpen the story even more.

• I’ll start loading the scenes on here roughly weekly, about 1-2 scenes at a time. I’m hoping this lasts for about two or three months. (Second drafts tend to be a bit quicker for me). I’ll accompany them with notes on my thought process and what still may need improvement.

• Additionally, I’ll take advantage of the weekly format to link other people’s interesting antiwork content that I keep meaning to plug on BQE but never get around to.

• I have made a special mailing list for these dispatches called “Sirena’s Pages.” You are all automatically on it. If you ever want to keep getting Big Quit Energy but skip the screenplay updates, you can easily adjust your settings using the “unsubscribe” button at the bottom of this or any of my emails and opting out of Sirena’s Pages specifically. (No hard feelings!)

Notes on the state of the project

In the spirit of becoming less rigid, I’ll ignore the format from previous entries as it seems like overkill at this point. Instead, find scattered notes on some of the biggest changes since we last talked.

The biggest shock: a first draft that was REALLY fun to write

This is the 11th script for which I’ve written at least one complete draft. For all previous ones, the first draft felt like crossing a desert of hot coals while whipping myself in self-loathing. Not only was this one fun to write, but as soon as I finished it I was already dying to do a rewrite (I’ve had to force myself to take a break). For previous scripts, I wanted the story out of my sight and often never got around to picking it up for a rewrite.

What has made this time different?

A less rigid process

The bulk of the credit goes to the new writing approach inspired by Robert Bosswell that I previously discussed.

Not worrying about knowing where I was going with the story before writing it, I didn’t put as much pressure on nailing everything in my outline. This allowed me a hybrid, non-linear process, where I would spice up rounds of outlining the story by vomiting out whatever scenes came to me, in random order (these often inspired new ideas in the outline itself).

Later, when I formally shifted from outlining to writing the script, I was able to alternate between rewriting scenes I already had with “improvising” new scenes further ahead in the story. This not only gave me variety and novelty, avoiding ruts, but it also added up to a first draft that in practice had been “rewritten” two or three times already.

Immediate feedback and ideation with Chat-GPT

And that was all BEFORE I experimented with chatGPT for feedback, which also added to the fun. If you’re an old fan of the blog, you may remember that our first podcast ever was about whether AI destroys or enhances the human creative spirit. Back then, I had never used AI tools to aid in projects, and used this opportunity to try it.

Setting environmental guilt aside for a second, I have been pleasantly surprised at how Chat-GPT helped make the process more creatively stimulating and efficient.

Immediate feedback: for starters, it alleviates what may be the most painful thing about screenwriting–how long it takes to get feedback. Ordinarily, I’d have to wait months while I finish a draft and finding someone qualified and willing to read a long script. With ChatGPT, I can get structural, dialogue, and tonal feedback on every scene, immediately. (it helps to prompt it to think like different screenwriting professors or film directors).

I worked this into the writing process of every scene: after doing my own rewrite, I’d do a round of feedback from ChatGPT and incorporate what I thought was reasonable. You have to retain your critical thinking when doing this, as GPT often gives very literal and conventional advice. But that’s a great perspective to get, while your human advisors can give a more ambitious, gut-driven perspective.

Also, not to be discounted, discussing your script everyday (even if with a machine) makes the process feel less lonely.

Fun brainstorming rewrite attempts: I say “attempts” because, in my opinion, ChatGPT is not a good overall writer, especially when it comes to long pieces like scenes (let alone a whole movie). If you’re hoping AI will take your outline and write a masterpiece (or worse, plot a story from scratch itself) prepare for an underwhelming, forgettable piece that’s basically the unoriginal average of everything ever written.

However! AI knows conventions well (both from specific genres and from Hollywood overall), which made it helpful to me in two ways:

• It helped me gauge ways to make my outline or my scenes truer to the slacker genre. I would have it rewrite a scene as an over-the-top slacker film and, while a lot of what it wrote was cringe, there were always one or two brilliant moments where it would use genre conventions to push the scene.

• I used it as a brainstorming tool by having it do other exercises with the scene: rewrite it in completely unrelated genres, or as an homage to a random film, or even from the perspective of someone who doesn’t even make films. Borrowing from other domains is great to inject freshness into the genre you’re focusing on, and with chat GPT I could do tons of these thought exercises in a short period without much mental fatigue.

More brevity, sooner: as you can probably tell, I’m not naturally concise as a writer or as a talker. One way in which GPT has me beat is its ability to take long globs of description or dialogue and shorten them without losing their essence. I took advantage of this, and as a result, the first draft (while still having its problems) is a much quicker and easier read than 137-page first drafts usually are. I’m sure my human feedback partners were glad for that.

My GPT conclusion: not good for generating original ideas, excellent to refine and improve your original ideas. I appreciated that if you give it something that’s out there, it doesn’t try to sand it down the way an idiot creative executive would. It rolls with it while helping you bring it home in a technically sound and genre-true way as possible.

The biggest pressing need: brevity

Yes, you heard right: the script is 137 pages long (each page usually equates to one minute of run-time). This is unacceptably long for a comedy–especially a slacker film. Draft two will need to chop off 27 pages, ideally 37, maybe even 47. No sweat, though: everything I write is usually double the length it should be at first.

What’s this movie about again?

While lost in writing the draft, I kind of lost track of its thematic north star.

In the process, its original incarnation (“American culture can’t stand for marginalized people who have been ‘given a chance’ to choose contentment and unproductiveness”) has been joined by a second theme, less focused on the societal antagonist force and more “personal.” Right now I can only clumsily articulate it as: “True freedom lies not in escaping societal expectations but in finding rest and solidarity amidst them.”

This follows Sirena’s character arc which, contrary to many slacker films, involves a change.

Still haven’t quiiite nailed our slacker protagonist

While Sirena’s character arc and personality feels more or less nuanced, I’ve been repeatedly told that her philosophy and relationship with work isn’t clear.

It doesn’t help that there are sequences where she willingly works hard and hustles, even if the reasons she does it aren’t exactly “aspirational” or satisfactory to those around her. I thought that nuance would be enough, but apparently not! I’ll have to work to clarify her motivation, hopefully without killing her mystery.

Even further away with our antagonist

While Sirena is almost there, Zoe presents a bigger problem. Tonally, she jumps around from humanized and empathetic to cartoonish to deeply evil. Given her monumental importance to the story, she’s the character I have to fix up the most.

In hand with her tonal shifts, Zoe doesn’t currently have a strong, explicit justification for being at the border when Sirena and her family try to cross or for and taking them into her home (a large commitment, after all). She has a reason, I swear. But in the story’s current state this reason is internally driven and not very clear.

Starting your story on a seemingly whimsical decision is not always condemning it to fail, but it’s not great. Fortunately, a fellow screenwriter had an amazing suggestion for how to fix this, which you’ll get to see in real-time during the second draft rewrite. Fixing this may also give me a stronger “inciting incident,” another crucial ingredient the story still lacks.

Matilde and Grizzie emerge as nice surprises

On a positive note, I’m very pleased with Sirena’s mom, Matilde. Previously a stock character, she now feels complex and drives a lot of the story. This is the most gratifying and unexpected change from the last time I checked in with you.

Alongside her, Grizzie–originally just a comic relief side-character–has also grown to be complex and central.

These changes are the conscious result of someone telling me that this seems like a story of the four women mentioned so far, each one representing a different reaction to American work expectations. Sirena is the most oppositional (to a fantastical extent) and Zoe the most zealous, while Matilde and Grizzie cope in more nuanced and contradictory ways. Elevating the latter two has enriched the story.

The dilemma of Paco

This leaves us with our final main-ish character. I originally gave Paco a prominent role in the story’s final act, but scaled it down to give Matilde more importance. Yet, I’ve kept depth and detail in his character that now feels outsized for his current screen-time.

I remain attached to the gender expectations dynamic that he brings as Sirena’s unrequited romantic suitor. Problem is, now he feels like one big loose end. I’ve got to figure out how to downplay him (or remove him, like I did Zoe’s husband) and make him a little less emotionally complex as he plays his role.

You may have noticed that in past dispatches I’ve linked a PDF with the latest outline or draft of the story. Since I’ll be sharing improvements real-time with you soon, I’m gonna skip that step today. Expect dispatches of scenes to begin in 2-3 weeks! I’m excited to share this next phase of the project with you with more regularity.

Thank you all for your continued readership and support of this project, and of Big Quit Energy as a whole. Appreciate you!

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