Sirena's Scenes: Beating Sloth is Tiring Work
Act IIA, Scene 4 + the edge between effort and injury
Better late than never, this special Sunday edition of Sirena’s scenes.
Today, Matilde launches a side business with some divine help. Sirena preps for her interview and starts to feel the burnout. They begrudgingly help each other despite Matilde’s saltiness.
This is the relative calm before the shitstorm. Let’s dive in!
THE SCENE
INT. Church. Day.
A congregation sings weakly along to a church choir. In a pew, SIRENA sits in an ill-fitting button up shirt. MATILDE sits next to her in her Sunday best, into the ceremony.
Sirena leans over.
SIRENA (whisper, Spanish) Since when are we religious?
Matilde shushes her.
Sirena sighs as a Latino priest, FATHER NOTARIO, preaches.
FATHER NOTARIO (Spanish) Sloth will be our community’s downfall.
Sirena rolls her eyes.
FATHER NOTARIO All sins are deadly, but in this country, my children, sloth is the deadliest.
Sirena leans toward JAIME, who sits on her other side.
SIRENA I guess we’re doomed.
Jaime shushes and elbows her.
EXT. Church. Day
The congregation mingles. Sirena stands with Jaime.
She eyes Matilde, who is chatting with Father Notario, practically glowing.
Matilde returns with a bounce in her step.
SIRENA (Spanish) What are you so hyped about?
MATILDE (Spanish) I can use his basement.
SIRENA His basement? For what?
MATILDE For my repair clients.
SIRENA Oh, that’s great!
MATILDE See? I don’t need to live off your charity.
SIRENA Excuse me?
Matilde walks away.
SIRENA You mean the Nutrivance thing? You’re the one that wants to work there so bad!
Matilde keeps walking. Sirena speeds up.
SIRENA Why are you acting like you’re doing me a favor?
She stops tired of the chase, but calls after her.
SIRENA Also, expanding your business was my idea! You’re welcome!
INT. Feel-Good Creamery and Cafe. Day.
TITA is on Sirena’s screen. Sirena rummages through the shelves and the counters as she speaks.
SIRENA (Spanish) She’s being so ungrateful. As if I enjoyed getting dragged into all her schemes.
She looks at a pantry full of boxes and knick-knacks and throws her arms up frustrated.
TITA (on phone, Spanish) I don’t know, I’ve always admired her ambition.
Sirena looks at that backroom door, dashes toward it.
SIRENA Well, you’re not her daughter.
INT. Feel-Good Creamery and Cafe--backroom. Day.
Sirena puts a bunch of spare parts into her backpack, her phone propped in front of her, still on Facetime with Tita.
TITA Your job won’t notice?
SIRENA They got dozens.
TITA My crockpot is gathering dust back there, I see.
Sirena turns around--in her employee locker, her crockpot sits, long unused. She sighs, ashamed.
SIRENA I’ve been a little busy.
She brightens, resolute.
SIRENA But I’ll be home soon, with a sweet van. It’ll be worth it.
EXT. Street Day.
Sirena hustles down the street with her backpack. She holds Tita on the phone with one hand, and a coffee with the other.
She slurps on her coffee.
TITA Sirena! I can’t believe it!
SIRENA I know, I know. Sorry.
INT. Church Basement. Day.
The space looks like a mix between a workshop and a waiting room at the DMV.
Matilde, in goggles, tinkers with a toaster on a workbench. PACO greets a CUSTOMER with a busted toaster.
PACO Another patient for Dr. Matilde!
Matilde, focused on another appliance, shoots him a thumbs up.
Sirena bursts in, Tita still on her phone.
SIRENA (Spanish) Took me forever, but I think I got it.
She drops her backpack onto the table. A few parts clatter loudly. Everyone looks. Sirena freezes. Matilde tries to subtly step in front of the backpack.
SIRENA (whisper) Freaking church acoustics.
She hands the phone to Matilde.
SIRENA It’s Tita. Say hi.
Matilde blinks into the phone.
MATILDE (Spanish) Hello Tita. Good to see you.
TITA (Spanish) Hello, “ingeniera.”
Matilde smiles wide.
Sirena unloads boxed parts from her backpack.
SIRENA Been a while since someone called her that. (to Matilde) Is this what you need?
Matilde nods, inspecting them.
ZOE (O.S.) Sirena.
Matilde covers the parts and Sirena whips up to look up.
ZOE waits at a folding table, notebook open, pen ready.
ZOE You’re late.
Sirena looks from Zoe, to Matilde, to Tita on the phone.
SIRENA We were gonna do a thing, weren’t we?
ZOE Yes, a thing. Your interview.
Sirena cringes.
MATILDE (to the phone) Tita, Sirena has an appointment.
TITA Another one? She already sounds beat.
Sirena snatches the phone.
SIRENA I’m not beat!
Matilde hangs up for her and returns her phone with a subtle shove to get her to go to Zoe.
CUT TO:
Sirena and Zoe sit at a folding table, far enough from the action to seem exiled. Zoe holds up a notebook like it’s a bible.
ZOE Why do you want this job?
SIRENA (weary, visibly tired) Because I want to...uh...grow? To new heights?
ZOE You sound like a fortune cookie. Again.
Sirena groans.
ZOE I’m sorry, am I inconveniencing you?
GRIZZIE bursts in, tossing her bag down.
SIRENA (To Zoe) I got a lot going on.
ZOE You got the café and interview prep.
SIRENA AND! we got--
She stops herself after Grizzie gives her a sharp look from across the room.
ZOE And...what?
SIRENA That’s it, actually.
ZOE I should nominate you for Crain’s.
Grizzle sees Matilde and sneaks over to her. She takes Matilde’s phone and pushes on the screen, then shows her.
GRIZZIE What we talked about.
Matilde looks at the social account: @Ingeniera. Thousands of followers.
Her eyes brighten.
MATILDE All those people?
Beaming, Matilde looks toward Zoe. Zoe fixates on Grizzie now.
ZOE Another one who’s late.
Grizzie hurries over to the table and unpacks her books.
ZOE It’s like a contagion.
CUT TO:
Grizzie and Sirena study diligently while Paco, sitting with them, tinkers with an appliance as he assists Matilde.
Zoe sits at another table, typing authoritatively on a laptop.
Grizzie looks at her, resentful.
GRIZZIE Didn’t our grandparents hustle so we wouldn’t have to? Why’s she obsessed with making life harder?
Sirena grimaces as she looks at something in her notes.
Paco notices.
PACO You good?
Sirena points at her notes.
Paco gestures toward Matilde. Sirena shakes her head: no.
Paco gets up anyway.
PACO (To Matilde, Spanish) Ingeniera!
Sirena shushes and tries to stop him. Paco perseveres.
PACO How does precision agriculture save water?
Sirena recoils, mortified.
Matilde looks at Sirena skeptically.
MATILDE Sensors. Drones. Satellite imagery.
Sirena jots down notes furiously.
Matilde tests out the newly-fixed toaster by toasting some of the church wafers for eucharist. People clap when they pop up, beautifully toasted.
She smiles, and brings the study group some toasted wafers.
MATILDE Here, you’ve earned a break.
Sirena nods as she takes a bite.
She takes a sip of coffee and spills it on her notes.
SIRENA Gahhh.
She tries to clean her notes up but they’re smudged.
MATILDE Just focus on the sensors, Sirena. You’ll survive it.
Sirena looks at her and nods.
ZOE Taking a snack break, are we?
Matilde takes the opportunity and walks over to Zoe, phone in hand, showing her social place.
MATILDE Look, my business is taking off.
Zoe doesn’t even look at it.
ZOE That’s nice. It’s no reason to distract the others.
Matilde stops cold, nods and scurries away.
Grizzie rolls her eyes.
GRIZZIE She wasn’t distracting us.
ZOE OK, so Sirena: how does precision agriculture save water?
SIRENA Uh..because...sensors...
She looks over at Matilde, but Matilde has her eyes glued on an appliance. Sirena ruffles through her notes. Awkward silence until the toaster POPS it again from across the room.
Sirena sighs. Everyone gets back to work.
SCENE NOTES
At this point, we’re 70 pages into the script. If we’re trying to stay close to conventional script length for the genre (we definitely are), we’re about 15 pages over where we should be at this point. The script as a whole, and especially this sequence, will need major tightening. Some candidates for cutting/compressing:
The church service scene. A friend had given me the idea of playing with a priest that pays lip service to work ethic but kind of underhandedly believes in cutting people breaks. I like that a lot, and enjoy the scene as it’s written, but it’s a side-sketch that isn’t essential to the story.
Because I take to heart the rule that more conflict is better, I have Matilde being resentful at Sirena trying to “sneak her” into Nutrivance as an act of “charity.” But I’m not fully sold that it rings true. And either way, the conflict is resolved way too quickly (in the same sequence!) and never has much explicit bearing on the future. Prime cutting candidate.
And if I cut that, I’ll likely need to cut or re-think the moment of Matilde helping Sirena for her interview with Paco as a middleman. It’s a fun interaction but it becomes unnecessary if Matilde isn’t peeved.
All that said, I worry about Sirena and Matilde’s relationship being too smooth and linear during this entire act.
Knowing that a lot of tension between Matilde and Sirena is coming in the next act, do I need to “seed” it so that it doesn’t come out of nowhere?
Have I already done enough of that without Matilde needing to be resentful in this sequence? I’ve had the two bicker at each other, but not sure it’s enough to justify them turning into harsh antagonists.
Looking at positives: a strength of this version versus the last draft is that Sirena’s growing burnout is more palpable, which will make the next scene after this one feel less random.
Also, self-congratulations for the toasted eucharist bit. I made myself laugh with that one.
Antiwork content of the week: the razor edge between effort and injury
A short, highly thought-provoking piece by Peter Clayborne that invites you to look at how effort, burnout, abundance, and scarcity feed into each other, while capital insists on treating them separately and making individuals responsible for systemic excesses (of course).
These dispatches are part of a “Sirena’s Scenes,” a special BQE section with installments of our slacker film script accompanied by interesting pieces of antiwork-adjacent content.
Wanna keep getting the rest of Big Quit Energy without Sirena’s Scenes? Manage your subscription settings.
I'm puzzling over the priest scene too. The lack of energy in the service, the word and deed not melding.... He's an interesting counter-example figure of authority against the hustle word and deed of assumed corporate and capitalistic leadership.